Beware! Blended Families + Death = A Possible Nightmare

If you've ever watched "Modern Family," you're aware that today's families come in a diverse array of configurations. The traditional definition of a family as a unit consisting of a mother, father, and two (or perhaps 2.5?) children is a thing of the past. But really, what's with the ".5"? This piece will shine a spotlight on a family structure increasingly seen in our society: the blended family.

Navigating the Complex Landscape of Blended Families

The term "blended family" is used when parents from previous relationships remarry, bringing together a mix of children and stepparents. Harmony may prevail as long as both parents are alive, but this can drastically change upon the death of one parent. This shift often occurs because legal frameworks haven't yet fully adapted to contemporary understandings of "family," typically defaulting in favor of the surviving spouse. This default arrangement works seamlessly for spouses who share biological children, but it becomes problematic when the deceased parent leaves behind children from a different union, potentially dispossessing them of their inheritance.

Several factors contribute to these unfortunate outcomes:

  • - A parent might place unwavering trust in their new spouse, unable to envision a scenario where the step-parent might act against the children’s interests;

  • - The surviving spouse might prioritize their welfare or that of their biological children from a previous marriage over that of their stepchildren;

  • - A lack of awareness about the potential repercussions following their death, coupled with not seeking proper legal counsel, leaves the parent unprepared for the implications of their passing.

A Real-Life Cautionary Tale Turned Nightmare

In a story shared by marketwatch.com, a woman recounts her harrowing experience. Her father, whom we'll refer to as "Dad," had amassed several properties, one of which was her childhood home. After remarrying, his health began to deteriorate, prompting his new wife, "Stepmom," to strategize financially to ensure Dad qualified for Medicaid, a program designed for those unable to afford medical care. This strategy, while common for preserving assets for future generations, took a dubious turn.

To meet Medicaid's eligibility, Dad needed to transfer his assets. Stepmom, convincing Dad she was a trustworthy custodian, became the recipient of all his properties. After Dad's passing, Stepmom sold these assets, funneling the proceeds to herself and her biological daughter, completely bypassing Dad's children from his first marriage. This maneuver left Dad's biological children without their rightful inheritance.

Hold On - Can That Really Be Legal?

You might be shocked by the outcome, deeming it so egregiously unfair it surely can't be lawful. Yet, astonishingly, it is entirely within the bounds of legality. Once the properties were legally transferred to Stepmom, she gained full autonomy over them, choosing intentionally to exclude her stepchildren from any financial benefit. Legally, she was well within her rights to do so, leaving the children without legal standing or hope of recourse. They would stand no chance in a legal battle, any day of the week.

This situation prompts serious reflection: Is this really what Dad intended? Could he have anticipated Stepmom's decision to disinherit his children? Was he aware of alternative strategies that could have safeguarded his children's interests while still ensuring eligibility for government assistance? Had he received comprehensive advice from a knowledgeable attorney, might he have chosen a different path?
Steps to Protect Your Children from Undesirable Outcomes

To prevent your family from facing similar distressing outcomes, here are actionable steps you can undertake immediately:

1. **Embrace the Unavoidable**: Benjamin Franklin famously said, "Nothing is certain but death and taxes," and he wasn't entirely joking (although taxes can sometimes be mitigated with astute estate planning—more on that later). Death is inevitable, yet discussing or planning for it often feels taboo. Acknowledge death as a certainty and start making plans accordingly.

2. **Organize a Family Discussion**: Open, heartfelt conversations about your desires, values, and aspirations can significantly reduce misunderstandings after your departure.

3. **Prioritize Education**: The most crucial step is to educate yourself—and to do it now. Avoid relying solely on the internet since laws vary significantly by state, as do family structures and asset management strategies. Online resources can't fully account for these nuances.

4. **Engage with a Knowledgeable Attorney**: Estate and end-of-life planning are highly individualized, and what's effective for one family may not suit another. Your family deserves a customized plan that addresses your specific needs. Seek out a compassionate, experienced lawyer who understands the intricacies of your family's situation and can provide the education needed to establish a foolproof plan. The future well-being of your family hinges on this.

You can ensure your loved ones avoid heartbreaking scenarios by having candid discussions, educating yourself properly, and following the advice of a trusted attorney. By doing so, you can create a plan that maintains harmony and ensures your family is cared for in accordance with your wishes.

To discover more about our empathetic yet strategic approach to estate planning and how we can help keep your assets within the family, consider scheduling a complimentary 15-minute consultation with our office.

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This article is a service of 20WestLegal LLC. We don't just draft documents; we ensure you make informed and empowered decisions about life and death for yourself and the people you love. That's why we offer a Planning Session, during which you will get more financially organized than you've ever been before and make all the best choices for the people you love. You can begin by calling our office today to schedule an Initial Planning Session and mention this article to find out how to get this $750 session at no charge.

The content is sourced from Personal Family Lawyer® for use by Personal Family Lawyer® firms, a source believed to be providing accurate information. This material was created for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as ERISA, tax, legal, or investment advice. If you are seeking legal advice specific to your needs, such advice services must be obtained on your own separate from this educational material.