Planning with Pride: Protecting Your People, Your Way
As Pride Month kicks off, we’re here for the celebration and the real talk. Yes, we’ve made huge strides (hello, marriage equality), but let’s not pretend the work is done.
LGBTQIA+ individuals, couples, and families still face some seriously frustrating gaps in legal protection—from who gets to make healthcare decisions, to who actually inherits what, to how your chosen family is treated when it really matters.
That’s where estate planning comes in. It’s not just a nice-to-have—it’s your power move to make sure your wishes are followed, your loved ones are protected, and no one gets left out because the law hasn’t caught up with your life.
The Legal Landscape for LGBTQIA+ Families: What You Need to Know (and Do)
Let’s get honest for a second: Marriage equality was a huge win—but it didn’t fix everything. The legal landscape for LGBTQIA+ families is still complicated, varies wildly by state, and leaves far too many couples and parents unprotected if they don’t have the right documents in place.
Here’s what I mean:
In some states, non-biological parents in same-sex relationships might not be legally recognized unless there's clear paperwork.
Healthcare decisions can get messy fast if estranged biological family members show up and challenge your partner’s rights.
Assets without proper beneficiary designations? They could end up with long-lost relatives instead of the person who’s been by your side for decades.
The truth is, many LGBTQIA+ adults are in committed relationships, raising kids, building beautiful lives—but are less likely to have estate plans compared to straight couples. That leaves too much up to chance, or worse, to outdated laws that don’t reflect your reality.
Here’s the good news: you can take control. With solid Estate Planning, you can put legal protections in place that reflect your values, your chosen family, and your wishes—loud and clear.
Because your life isn’t cookie-cutter, and your plan shouldn’t be either.
Traditional Estate Planning vs. Estate Planning Session: What’s the Real Difference?
Here’s the deal: Traditional estate planning usually means a will, a power of attorney, and maybe a healthcare directive—documents you check off a list, stick in a drawer, and forget about. Sound familiar?
Now, don’t get me wrong—those documents matter. But for LGBTQIA+ individuals, couples, and families, basic planning can give a false sense of security. And that false security can come back to bite you when your loved ones are grieving and scrambling to clean up a legal mess you didn’t see coming.
Why? Because traditional planning doesn’t cover the bigger picture. A plain old will might say who gets what, but it won’t stop a probate court from airing your private business or giving estranged family members a chance to contest your wishes. And it sure doesn’t adapt when your life shifts—new partner, new home, new laws, new family dynamic.
Enter: Estate Planning Session
This isn’t your grandmother’s estate plan (unless your grandmother was a total badass who planned for everything).
With Estate Planning Session, we go deeper. We talk about you—your people, your values, your stories, your wishes, and how to keep everything protected and honored when you're not around to explain it.
Here’s what makes it different:
We start with education. You’ll actually understand what happens if you don’t plan—so you can make confident, informed decisions.
We inventory all your assets. Yes, your bank accounts and house—but also your wisdom, your love notes, your life lessons. It’s not just about stuff.
We prioritize decision-making. Who speaks for you if you can’t? Who takes care of your kids? Your partner? It’s all planned—no guesswork, no court drama.
We update your plan as life changes. Because life will change. And so should your plan.
And we tailor it to you. No cookie-cutter templates. We look at your unique family structure, your risks, your goals, and make sure your plan is built for your life.
Estate Planning is proactive, personal, and powerful. And when we do it together, we’re not just filling out paperwork—we’re protecting your people and the life you’ve worked so hard to build.
More Than Just Paperwork: Real Protections for LGBTQIA+ Families
(AKA: What You Need in Place to Keep the Courts—and Chaos—Out of Your Business)
For LGBTQIA+ individuals and families, estate planning isn’t just a smart idea—it’s a non-negotiable. Why? Because chosen families, non-traditional parenting arrangements, and long-term partnerships without legal recognition still face unnecessary legal obstacles that a good plan can wipe off the map.
Here’s what should absolutely be part of your Estate Plan:
Healthcare Docs That Actually Protect You
A healthcare power of attorney and living will aren’t just boxes to check. These are must-haves to make sure your partner or chosen person can make medical decisions for you—without getting blocked by a distant cousin or estranged parent who hasn’t seen you in 10 years. Plus, a living will lays out your wishes for end-of-life care so your loved ones aren’t left making gut-wrenching decisions without a clue.
Financial Power of Attorney
If something happens and you can’t manage your finances, this doc lets your chosen person step in—pay bills, access accounts, and keep your life afloat. Without it, even the love of your life could be legally shut out. Don’t let that happen.
Inheritance Planning That Skips the Drama
Yes, marriage helps—but it doesn’t solve everything. A solid trust keeps things private, skips probate, and ensures your stuff goes to your people (not just whoever’s legally next in line). No contests, no courtroom surprises.
Protecting Non-Traditional Families
If you’re raising kids in a same-sex relationship or with a chosen co-parent, we need to go the extra mile. Adoption papers, parenting agreements, and guardianship nominations all play a role in making sure your children stay with the right people if something happens to you.
Your Digital Life Matters Too
From Instagram to crypto, your digital assets deserve just as much attention. Who gets access? What should be deleted? What’s sacred? We’ll help you get it all documented so your digital legacy doesn’t disappear—or fall into the wrong hands.
LGBTQIA+ families need more than a basic plan. You need a real plan that reflects your life, your values, and your people.
Creating Your Estate Plan (With Someone Who Actually Gets You)
Planning your life and legacy isn’t just about filling out forms and hoping for the best—it’s about finding the right person to guide you through it. Someone who understands the unique dynamics of LGBTQIA+ individuals, couples, and families, and knows how to make the law work for you—not against you.
That’s where I come in. As a Personal Family Lawyer®, I don’t just hand over a basic will and send you on your way. We go deeper. We look at the real stuff—your relationships, your goals, your chosen family, your fears—and we build a plan that actually protects the life you’ve built.
It all starts with a Planning Session. We’ll talk about what matters most to you, what would happen right now under the law if something went sideways, and how to make sure your wishes—not a judge’s—are the ones that stand. From there, we design a plan that keeps your loved ones out of court and conflict, and fully protected.
But it doesn’t stop there. Life changes—laws change—you change. So we’ll check in, keep things current, and make sure your plan keeps working the way it’s supposed to. Because an outdated estate plan is basically a false sense of security. And we’re not about that life.
So let’s do this the right way—with a plan that’s as real, flexible, and future-proof as you are.
How to Get Started (Like, Right Now)
Pride Month is all about celebrating who you are and the people you love. It’s also the perfect time to make sure those people—and your wishes—are legally protected, no matter what life (or the courts) throw your way.
Creating your Estate Plan with me means more than just checking legal boxes. It means peace of mind that your partner, your kids, your chosen family—your people—won’t be left unprotected or tangled up in legal red tape if something happens.
Ready to stop putting it off and finally get this handled? Let’s make it easy.
Schedule your free 15-minute call today and let’s chat about what protection looks like for you: https://go.20westlegal.com/meeting-scheduler
Because love is powerful—but love + a plan? That’s unstoppable.
This article is a service of 20WestLegal LLC. We don't just draft documents; we ensure you make informed and empowered decisions about life and death for yourself and the people you love. That's why we offer a Planning Session, during which you will get more financially organized than you've ever been before and make all the best choices for the people you love. You can begin by calling our office in Sudbury, Massachusetts today to schedule an Estate Planning Session and mention this article to find out how to get this $750 session at no charge.
The content is sourced from Personal Family Lawyer® for use by Personal Family Lawyer® firms, a source believed to be providing accurate information. This material was created for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as ERISA, tax, legal, or investment advice. If you are seeking legal advice specific to your needs, such advice services must be obtained on your own separate from this educational material.